Dear Recumbent Bike

Dear Recumbent Bike,

I owe you an apology.

In college, I referred to you as the "hang over bike". The piece of cardio equipment used by my peers and I when we were walking zombies but felt a trip to the gym was necessary to discount our mid-night meatball sub beer munchies or to sweat out one vodka cranberry too many.

I saw people study their biology notes on you in preparation for their final exams or read Grapes of Wrath for the umpteenth time for their English class. Those people weren't really working out. They were doing homework and moving their legs in a circular motion. That doesn't count.

I teased your existence. I considered you fake.

Now, however, I respect you entirely. You aren't just for geriatrics, hung over college students, or physical therapy patients - you are also for pregnant people who are just too damn stubborn to give up a day at the gym. You are challenging as your seat reclines at an awkward angle and, at 5'3", I seem to fall right in between two adjustment slots at your base.

Unlike the other stationary and speed bikes, your seat is comfortable and you offer two options as handle bars which comes in handy as one adjusts speed and resistances. You do not cause cramping, pinched nerves, bizarre fetal movement, or lower back pain as do the other cardio machines. You are pregnancy friendly. You are glorious!



37 weeks

So yes - it is true that once my baby arrives, I will visit you less. I will not watch Rachel Ray and learn to make pesto sauce or The Doctors and learn the warning signs of meningitis, but I will respect you and your purpose. I will honor your unbiased approach to fitness and your understanding of people regardless of age, fitness level, trimester, or ability. And I will most certainly thank you for making physical fitness possible, albeit minimal and light, during the last weeks of my pregnancy.

Always,
Elizabeth

 

When ignorance is bliss

Sunday the 9th DJ and I attended our birth/parenting class and I kind of wish we didn't and just winged the whole labor and delivery portion of pregnancy.

The class opened with a clip of Bill Cosby doing stand up where he talks about "Natural Child Birth". If you haven't seen it, it is certainly worth looking up.
Anyway, we thought the class would have an element of humor, be a little light hearted, and teach us the ins and outs of labor. It seemed we were the only couple in the class with any sense of humor so from 9 to 4pm we suffered through ridiculous breathing exercises, poses, and posters laughing only to ourselves because everyone else was lame.

The poses we learned were to help the woman get comfortable as labor progressed. Unless you have the inability to move, I feel as though these are things one could figure out of her own. The same goes for the breathing exercises that will more than likely go out the window when "shit hits the fan", as they say. Oddly enough noone found it funny as we breathed our way through fake labor, asked for belly and back massages, or positioned ourselves to best ease the weight of our contracting uterus. Meanwhile, DJ and I are laughing hysterically at the ridiculousness of it all. Clearly we were getting an "F".

The day progressed with a video where we witnessed the miracle of birth. DJ decided to close his eyes during this part of our day, but I decided since its my body, I should know what happens down there. It was a bad idea. The video was from 1972 and these women looked miserable, sloppy, and sweaty. For some reason there was a lot of boob exposure as well, which made it awkward, and then spouses or "labor partners" looked creepy and annoying.

One man said his wife found his coaching was most successful when he got "three inches away from her face and made encouraging remarks". Are you kidding me! If you are three inches from my face, you are going to get slapped.
One woman said when she was tired and about to give up, her baby started crowning and she reached down between her legs and touched the top of his head. Aside from being incredibly awkward to watch, it made me cringe as the camera zoomed in on her hoo-ha. My body decided to phyiscally react to the scene by recoiling in my folding chair while the rest of the women seemed to lean forward eagerly, excited to excrete a fuzzy topped watermelon out of their girl parts.

This video was followed by another award winner regarding pain management options- none of which were appealling. We also saw the little suction cup thing that goes on the babies head if he or she gets stuck on the way out.

The class ended with procedures and practices once our fetus enters the world and becomes a baby. We covered car seats, pediatrician hunting, and breast feeding. St. Peter's is obviously a Catholic hospital so breast feeding is STRONGLY encouraged to a point that when I asked what would happen if a woman could not produce enough milk, our teacher looked at me as if I committed a deadly sin. She danced around the answer until I asked if my child would be left to starve. She ended with an "if all else fails, then I guess we will give your baby a bottle" response. Well gee, thanks lady!

Apparently failure to breast feed means you are a bad parent. So does going back to work as our teacher had a naive answer when asked about the use of breast pumps - "well you won't need a breast pump if you aren't going back to work since you will also have access to your baby". Last time I checked it was 2012 and most couples, partnerships, or mothers in general do not have that luxury. Many of us will have to spend those weeks off eeking by on our 60% salary with every intention of returning to the work world.

We did leave with a few useful tips like how often to feed your baby during the first weeks, how to time the feedings so you get a longer stint of sleep at night, what things might look weird on your baby when he/she first arrives but are actually normal, and how long labor may or may not be. The tour of the hospital was also really helpful and the fact that we will get our own rooms was certainly appealing. If I one day have the opportunity to teach a birthing class, I will certainly make it much more open mined, fun, and audience interactive.

PS. Even if you mean it as a thoughtful, endearing compliment to a pregnant woman, do not tell a woman her "face looks fuller" at 7 1/2 months. She doesn't hear that. She hears "you're fat" and dwells on it all day.

Pregnancy Won The Day

After moving from the first trimester to the second, I have been more or less able to maintain the daily life and functions of a non-pregnant person but it seems like overnight the third trimester kicked in and yesterday - it kicked my butt.

For no scientific reason whatsoever, I blame the pertussis and flu shots I got on Monday. Between lethargy, pregnancy brain (I lost my keys and then found them in a bush), lack of sleep, and general aches, I just couldn't get it together yesterday. I was up at 4:00am and found myself watching Looney Toons and the Batman animated series until the Today Show at 7. An afternoon nap was kind of a bust and I spent most of the day laying around in a pathetic, groggy state. Petry won the day.

I find that if I get up, start my day, and have purpose I am far better equipped to bet the 3rd Trimester Sleepies. As paradoxical as it is, exercise helps a lot - even though actually getting to the gym can be a challenge. Until recently, I was able to run between 8 and 12 miles per week, but now with the constant need to pee its a little bit more of a challenge. Either way I still try until I am defeated and resign myself to a walk, the elliptical, or stationary bike. Exercise is also a comforting way to rationalize my insatiable hunger. Despite my unorthodox wake up time yesterday, I already downed 3 mini-meals before lunch and then 3 1/2 more by bedtime. This is also new since I hadn't been extra hungry at all during my 2nd trimester. (I may have been during my first or I was just using pregnancy as an excuse to eat more).

Lori's Birthday - DJ, Me, Lori - 30 wks.

Petry is also a very active baby which is fantastic and she/he always surpasses the goals of a morning and evening kick count. I have high hopes for a sports scholarship as, according to Mint.com, we will need to have $215,000 saved by 2030 for her/him to attend an out-of-state, public college or university. This incredibly intimidating number already has us discussing a savings plans, opening a 529, and working with a financial advisor. Babies are expensive. Of course this conversation took place AFTER I spent a chunk of change of Giants v. Cowboys tickets for DJ's 30th birthday. This said, Operation Saving for Petry starts today!

Friends and family have also been super fabulous during these last few weeks. Amy not only gave me an entire wardrobe, but hooked us up with a car seat, baby swing, toys, and other misc. baby stuff. Jen and Jamie are helping me out with baby walkers and exersaucers (which I thought were the same thing), and The Stanley's and Brad got us the City Mini Stroller. Lori got us a diaper tower with 90 diapers and her sister made us the cute little dessert below! We were able to save the little babies. Who the heck needs a shower! Not this girl! And friends - you can thank me since you now have one Sunday back in your life where you don't have to play baby word searches, match games, or fetus trivia.
This list has yet to include grandparents - of which, Petry won the lottery. Not only having the four best, but being the first grandchild of two only children. Set. For. Life. :)


http://www.dudleysdesserts.com/

 

 



PS. I am still Facebook free but today I heard/read two interesting things about social media. 1) According to a study shared on Q104.3, people hate when other people post too many pictures of their food, their kids, and public displays of affection and 2) This article was on Yahoo! News today - Do you need a Social Media Diet too? Click here to find out!
PSS. There as been a West Nile outbreak in certain parts of the country this week. Its mostly been in Texas, but cases have also popped up in Brooklyn. DJ told me last night they are also spraying "the other side of town" in Metuchen. Our town is only 3 square miles so I don't find that very comforting. As of today, there have been 1,118 cases across 38 states resulting in 41 deaths. Be wary!

Thank your body, Thank your baby

28 1/2 weeks!*

Since May I have been aiming to make it to the gym at least 5 days a week and during those trips run at least 8 miles a week. As mentioned in an earlier post, I have a stellar new route that allows me to pass two bathrooms (one being my own) and a water fountain. This has proved incredibly wonderful as my belly gets bigger and there is more pressure on my bladder. My mile pace ranges between 10 and 10 1/2 minute miles, which isn’t too shabby, especially because my loop is a little hilly. Hills that feel like mountains on some days.

On other days, Petry is clearly not up for a workout and would prefer that I sit on my but and veg. Fortunately the Olympics have been on the past two weeks and watching women run 26.2 miles in 2:22 has been particularly inspirational. Nur Suryani Mohamed of Malaysia was 8 months pregnant at the games. Granted she was an air rifle-ist, which I am not certain is even a sport per se, but she is still an Olympian. More on her here:Pregnant-Olympian-Malaysian-shooter-shrugs-off-criticism

No matter the day or the mood Petry is in, I have to say despite the struggles of actually getting pregnant, the pregnancy part has been relatively easy and for that reason, I daily thank my body and my baby. Of course I could do without the indigestion and the trouble sleeping, but unlike many, many, many women pregnancy has actually been a blessing to my digestive system. It is glorious. Each day is a new surprise whether it be hot flashes, excessive kicking (which is actually a good thing) or heart burn but I could have swollen ankles, veins, back pain, or - worst of all - bed rest.

The other day was my glucose tolerance test and the results came back "excellent" according to Dr. B. For those in the know, you have to fast before the blood work and its a two hour commitment so make appointments early in the AM. Where I go, LabCorp, they also take walk-ins so I was worried I would get screwed as the day wore on and the waiting room filled; however I guess the test is time sensitive enough that we, pregnant ladies, can just walk to the back every hour, grab a phlebotomist, and get our blood drawn without a hassle. This is HUGE since by 10:30, you are ready to gnaw someone's arm off. It's too a point the juice they gave me after my first blood draw seemed delicious since I was so hungry. It hindsight, it wasn't too bad - just super, sugary Hawaiin Punch.

*Disclaimer: I know I said there would be no sideways pictures in my life and, alas, you see one on this post. I have since decided to print out all of my pages and put them into a little binder for Petry once he/she exists and thought they should have a slight frame of reference regarding their mother's growth. I am still Facebook free and there are no "look at me, I'm pregnant" pictures on other social media sites as I still hold true to the belief that if you want to see me, you can ask. Don't hate.


The Skinny on Skin

Last week was Petry's 24 week visit and he/she is moving along and growing steadily. My placenta also moved out of the way so I can move full steam ahead into my 3rd trimester. August 3rd will be the official 3 months-to-go point.

I had thought I had lucked out and beaten a majority of the pregnancy side effects, but my skin decided to join in the fun this week while I was at the beach it became super sensitive. It started as an itch on my chest which I attributed to sun burn, but eventually it attacked my arms. By the time I left the beach, I was all red, but not from the sun - from the constant scratching. I did find relief in the ocean so, because I was too stubborn to call it a day and head back to the house, I continuously went in and out of it.

Avalon, NJ - 26 weeks

Sensitive skin during pregnancy is another body change caused by insane hormones. It can come out of nowhere and range from skin irritation to heat rash (in my case) to the stretching of skin in the belly, hips, thighs, and butt (always a cool place to scratch).  Irritation can be sparked by lotions, detergents, heat, and even foods, but the good news is they will pass after pregnancy. In my case, as soon as I was out of the sun/heat, my skin relaxed and felt back to normal.

I am more of less over the break out/acne stage that comes with pregnancy, but I attribute part of that to a good sun tan. So far, knock on wood, I have also beaten spider or varicose veins cause by increased blood flow. These squiggley little capillaries pop out on the surface of the skin and may not go away on their own. According to my parents I have "my dad's legs" which is good and may spare me from this little side effect.

Friday, August 8th is my glucose tolerance test which should be pretty lame. This test determines if I/Petry suffer from gestational diabetes or glucose intolerance.

Things I have learned from IVF and Pregnancy

Going into the whole IVF process, I really didn't have too many people to go to for advice. Obviously I had my doctor, my nurse, and the internet, but for the most part we were really just winging the physical, emotional, and stress related stuff. On the other hand, when you get pregnant people can't say enough about their own pregnancies. They have advice, nightmare stories, mom-to-be tips, book suggestions, articles, and opinions. It's really insane.

I felt the same kind of influx of advice when I got married. Everyone wants to put in their 2 cents and to that I say "nay!". The only piece of wedding advice I will give unsolicited is if you get married on a Saturday, leave for your honeymoon on Monday. You will want Sunday to relax, open gifts, eat a cheesey meatball sub (since you don't have to fit into a wedding dress anymore), and enjoy your first day of married life.

So I decided to document the lessons I learned and if you want to read them, feel free or if you are adviced out or think I am a fool to give advice - this is a blog post you can certainly skip. No harm; no foul.

IVF Tips:
1. You are much more kick ass than you think. 
As mentioned in the beginning of this whole saga, I was anti-shot. At 28 years old, my mom literally had to bribe me to get a flu shot and I had to hold my dad's hand as it was being administered. Now, I have learned you have to do what you have to do and tummy shots in a Marriot bathroom or nightly progesterone shots in the rear can be done because they have to be done for the greater good.
2.  Its okay to wallow but don't make a habit of it.
Learning you have infertility issues stinks, especially when it is the last thing you expect to hear from your beloved gyno. So it is okay to mope for an afternoon or for a day, BUT then be proactive and move on. I am not a religious person, but if you need to spend sometime in church - go for it. I chose lying in bed in the dark. Either way, embrace the funk and then move on.
3. Its okay to flip out. 
Flipping out is different than wallowing and unfortunately it comes on more than once during the IVF process. Of course you have a fabulous support team, but no one can really tell you how you are feeling because they may not get it. You are also being pumped with hormones that make you crazy. Should you flip out unnecessarily, make sure you apologize - you can blame progesterone. I would say I had one good flip out a month, but you may be a nicer, more controlled person and have less.
4. Thank your support group 
This probably goes without saying but they are more than likely the ones you are flipping out at/to. They are also the ones that have seen you wallow, are taking you to doctor appointments, are giving you shots, and just have to be around you in general.
5. Congratulate yourself
In A League of their Own, Tom Hanks' character is talking to Geena Davis' character right after she quits the Rockford Peaches because its "too hard". To this he replies "If it wasn't hard, everyone would do it. It's the hard that makes it great".
IVF isn't great but it is hard. On bad days, remind yourself of the greater good and how far you have come. Yes, day one of progesterone shots is just as annoying as day 72 BUT you are moving forward each day and that is excellent!
6. Invest in Pedailite
Should your ovaries be overstimulated, you will find yourself bloated and constipated. Jen, my nurse, recommended Gatorade or Pedialite. Go for the Pedialite (the mixed fruit or citrus kind if available). If you dilute it with water, it doesn't taste too bad and has much fewer calories than Gatorade.
7. Delete Social Media 
You don't need it. It will make you crazy, narcissistic, or angry. I initially deleted it back in November or December and although IVF has been a smooth sailing and positive process, I still think it is totally unnecessary and unhealthy. As of today I am about 7 months "sober".
8. Write things down
You don't necessarilly need to blog but you will want to chronicle this process. My dad wrote the entire story of my birth and it is an awesome read. When your kid is old enough to appreciate you as a parent, they will also appreciate the hard work that went into creating him or her.
9. Don't bring children, especially babies, to an infertility clinic 
Obviously if you had a successful pregnancy that resulted in a happy and healthy baby, that is fantastic but try your best to find a sitter if you are making a trip to your local infertility specialist. These places are filled with emotionally unstable women in a frustrating, shocking, expensive, and/or sad situations pumped with so many hormones they tear up during an episode of Cold Case (not that that ever happened to me :) ). Even if your first was an IVF success and you are prepping for your second, there are several women in that waiting room on a 2nd or 3rd round of IVF and there is a good chance they may experience some emotion between jealousy and rage at the sight of you.

Pregnancy Tips:
1. Make sure you are prepared. 
Obviously a baby should be planned and a conversation should be had by you and your partner about babies. You will want to make sure you have the funds, the space, and so on to bring a new little person into the world but also make sure you are physically prepared. I wasn't. I don't embraces the pregnant woman in a two piece look, I don't love having my stomach all out there, and as you saw I had a very hard time in the first trimester adjusting to the physical changes. This changes overtime, but it does take time. Be patient with yourself, try to embrace it, and if you can't - its only 9 months.
2. Don't be too proud for hand-me-downs. 
Pregnancy clothes will, hopefully, not be a lifetime staple in your wardrobe so don't be afraid to ask friends if they have any they want to get rid of. My friend Amy hooked me up with tons of great stuff and so far I have only bought a maternity tee shirt, a sun dress, a belly band, and running shorts and I am 23 weeks in.
3. Buy a belly band
You can get away with wearing your old pants a lot longer than you might think. I have yet to break into a pair of maternity pants because of it.
4. Buy empire waist dresses 

23 weeks preg in NY& Co dress
Holler! 

If you have a formal event to go to and don't want to buy a nice maternity dress, get one in an empire way that fits the pregnant you and the normal you (see right). This way you aren't spending money on a dress you will only wear once. Also no one will be like "didn't you just wear that an so-and-so's wedding?" because you are pregnant and hormonal and you might slap them.
5. Recognize your hormones
Like PMS, pregnancy may cause you to be angry, sad,  insane, or tired out of nowhere. Should your significant other, parent, or friend be at the wrong end of this wrath it can cause a raucous. If you go into a hormone induced rage, follow IVF Tip #3 and say sorry.
6. Watch your cravings
You are not eating for two. You are eating for 1.2. During pregnancy you are only suppose to eat an extra 100-300 calories per day, a little more if you exercise. Yes, there are days when you will have an insatiable appetite and find yourself on your 3rd bowl of Special K at 9:00 at night but try to choose something healthy and not a Kitchen Sink Sundae at your local ice cream joint.

Includes 3 sliced bananas, 8 scoops of ice creams,
8 toppings, whipped cream, and cherries. 

Also sometimes an unhealthy craving can easily be replaced by something more manageable -make English Muffin pizzas if you are craving a large pie, try chocolate milk in place of ice cream (you really just want the calcium), or try POP chips in place of Ruffles. 

7. Give into your cravings on occasion. 

Sometimes you are drinking milk and your body is thinking "what the hell is this nonsense?!" and still needs ice cream. Then, G-D-it!, go have some ice cream woman! 

8. People will have their comments

Between the annoying "when are you due" askers, the tummy touchers, and those that give all the credit to the male partner and his super sperm, people are going to say and do dumb and annoying things. Clearly people say dumb things everyday, but it seems pregnant women are more of a target to their commentary. The other day I was at the gym and some old man was like "looks like your husband didn't waste any time!" (insert cheesy old man laugh here). What the heck is that supposed to mean! And you don't know anything about anything! 

9. Pregnancy may not be awesome, but its awesome. 

No, pregnancy isn't comparable to the awesome weekend in Las Vegas you had with your girlfriends, the awesome time you had on your honeymoon, or the awesome deal you just got at TJ Maxx, but it awesome in the biblical sense. The first 2 definitions of "awesome" according to Webster, are 1) expression of awe; wonder that is inspired by the sacred or sublime and 2) an inspiring awe. Pregnancy is that kind of awesome. 

Pregnancy and Exercise

1. Even if it is the last thing you feel like doing - move!

This is hard to do in your first trimester because you are exhausted all the time and I'm sure during your third because you are quite large BUT the benefits of exercise during pregnancy are incredible for both you and your baby. 

2. Go outside

If you are fortunate enough to be pregnant during warm weather, exercise outside. It feels so much better and you can dazzle your neighbors by your athletic prowess and fab pregnant body. 

Even better: don't wear headphones! It helps to feed your ego when someone whispers "she looks fabulous" to her girlfriend as you jog past them (that actually happened today - win!!)

3. Invest in good sneakers

For every pound you lose, that is four pounds of pressure off your knees when running; therefore when you are gaining weigh you are putting more pounds of pressure on your knees. Make sure you have the proper foot and ankle support - it will go a long way.

4. Preplan your route and know where there are bathrooms. 

If you are at the gym, it is easy to jump of the treadmill, elliptical, or what have you and go pee. Not so easy if you are on the road, so find a route where you can take pit stops as needed along the way. My new route is kind of around my block so I continuously run past my house as well as the bathrooms/water fountain in the park.

6. Stay hydrated and watch your body temperature

Those are no brainers but in general: listen to your body. This may be tricky because your body is up to a lot of different things. You have gas, constipation, you may or may not have to pee, you may have a cramp or your baby may be kicking you in the bladder. Either way, pay attention to this signs and make decisions accordingly. 

7. Mix it up!

Look at that Intensity! 

Like any exercise regiment, you can't do the same thing every day. Lift weights (I hate lifting weights but I do it) as they will strengthen your arms and prepare you for carrying baby around, your back which will help later in pregnancy, and other part of your body. We also have a heavy bag in the garage which make for an interesting tae-bo hybrid that I mix with kettle bell work. Friends have also recommended swimming, prenatal yoga, and Pilates.
9. Stretch.
This may not be the case with anyone else but me but pregnancy has given me some wicked restless legs. At night i prop them on pillows, I stretch them, I curl up, but every 15 minutes or so I am moving around and readjusting and just cannot get comfortable. I usually "forget" to stretch or just don't really care, but I think that it will help my current leg situation if I would just spend the extra few minutes doing a little something after a workout.
10. Do your Kegal Exercises
Peeing in your pants when laughing, coughing, sneezing, or doing just about anything else loses its cool real fast!

Sorry - this was a little lengthy

PS. I saw a toupee on the street when I was running today
PSS. Our neighbors have human-sized Alvin & the Chipmunks characters in the garage. Weird.

Ode to my Knees

I bet you thought when that line turned blue
that my running days were through,
but alas, my friends,  it was a tease
and there was no rest for you, my Knees.

First trimester, you got lucky
as morning sickness made things yucky
but as the pregnancy progressed,
the running waters, I would test.

We started slow, 11 miles per hour
when I felt a kick of power
We upped the speed just some clicks
And from 5.5, we went to 6.

Of course you felt it, I gained weight
and from 118 and I hit 128
And just as you were feeling the hits,
I went and Googled the benefits.

Running helps me maintain
the weight by body needs to gain
but most importantly during baby creation,
running helps with constipation.

The cardio increases blood flow,
and makes babies smarter, studies show.
It helps with posture and varicose veins,
and greatly reduces other aches and pains.

"You bitch!" you shout as we hit the road,
carrying my extra load
but to you I say, we must move on
because the pros outweigh the cons.

And when we're home and you've been nice
I'll treat you to a pack of ice,
a hamstring stretch, a flex, a bend
to help you get back on the mend.

Clearly as we grow in size,
I'll also get flack from my Thighs
and my Calves, my Neck, my Back,
and then my sneakers, away we'll pack

and limit things to the elliptical
where I'll be forced to fulfill
the happiness that is a run
through the town and in the sun.

But! Come November, minus child
when a day is warm and mild
we'll lace up the Ascis and enjoy the breeze,
On the road with my favorite Knees.