Tuesday, February 26, 2013

A Year Ago This Month

February 2012 was a big month for us. We were on the verge of something huge. Whether IVF worked or it didn't, monumental things were in our midst. Fortunately we were able to land on the positive side of IVF, have a successful first round, and have our wonderful baby boy 9 months later, but I still clearly remember the waiting from the transfer date to the February 24th phone call that changed everything forever.

February 2013
Sunday night, a year after we found out we were pregnant, I was watching Austin sleep and, of course, was overwhelmed by emotion. Babies - you just can't help staring at them in general, but when its yours - the stare becomes a longing gaze - desire to just freeze the moment and capture it forever. While I sat there, reaching my hand through the bars of this crib, I just chanted "remember this moment, remember this moment". Even though people say how fast it goes, often ad nauseum, its true. Just less that fourth months ago, Austin came flying into this world, guns blazing, a mere 7 lbs. 6 oz., and now he is sleeping before me close to 16lbs, but still with his fabulous head of hair.

In a past entry I mentioned my freak out - about not wanting kids, about being the "cool Aunt", about how I hated how my body looked. Shame on me! Not that I knew it at the time, but I think of all the little rewards I would be missing if DJ and I went the "cool Aunt and Uncle" route. The early months of no sleep, the uncertainty coupled with being new parents, the "why is his poop that color?" concerns - all worth it!